Sometimes we become so comfortable in a role that we abandon the search for our true self; sometimes we literally abandon self. Other times we find ourselves in a role that we dislike and take steps to change, rebel, or become a martyr. Often we attach to a role for a while and then move on to explore another, keeping the aspects of each role that seem like truth for us as we continue our personal evolution.
When we are in a role, we speak the truth for that part, although it may not be true for us in another role or at another time. Which makes honesty a tenuous thing, changing as we become more and more of who we really are. And where it really gets interesting is in relationships, for that is where our multitudes of roles dance with each other. Similar to a square dance or minuet where partners change as the dance progresses, our different parts interact with our partner's different parts. Recognizing and accepting this process allows for growth and discovery within our relationships.
Some roles are scary with unmanageable components (like rage or addiction), and they become shadows that we alternately explode in or avoid. Getting stuck in a limiting or harmful role can have devastating consequences. Others seem more constant and comfortable, and some roles are called upon in response to a specific situation. Personal coaching encourages us to explore, transform, and integrate our repertoire of roles so that we can hone our skills and resources to deal with life in all of its permutations.
Awareness of the importance of roles in your growth process can help you make the choice not to continue to feel guilty for something you did in the past . You were just trying on a pair of shoes. And you liked them well enough to take them home, but after a while you decided that they did not fit so you took them off, and that is what is really important. Whatever it was that you did, if you are not still doing it now you are making amends to yourself. So forgive and play it forward.
And remember, all the different parts, all the different roles are simply the many facets on the diamond that is you.