While horsing around in Oregon mountains last week, I read Whole Heart, Whole Horse by Mark Rashid and came upon an intriguing question: Which is stronger: the Grand Canyon that contains the Colorado River or the Colorado River that carved the Grand Canyon? The Colorado River is a classic symbol of power and strength, and the force of its flow created a passageway through fossilized rock. And the Grand Canyon, known for its size and unmatched scenic vistas, is a symbol of majestic and rugged beauty that contains and directs the mighty waters of the Colorado River.
Obviously an argument can be made for either point of view depending on your perspective, which was exactly the author's point: perspective is everything. How do you see things? What are your values, expectations, intentions? Are they the same for the person or horse you are attempting to communicate with? Which is better, this style of approach or another? To insist that my way of seeing things is the only right way is to limit my vistas and possibilities and often leads to conflict.
People bring their horses to Rashid because they cannot get them to act the way they want them to act. What this successful trainer brings to each situation is the willingness to explore different perspectives, to experiment and see what might work to change the status quo, to open hearts for resolution of behavioral conflict. There is no punishment, no correcting to the "right way" to do or be. His flow of attention is like the river, his respect for boundaries like the rock, and I was reminded of the childhood game of Rock - Paper - Scissors. Scissors cuts paper which covers rock which breaks scissors. Each has its strengths and weaknesses depending on where you stand.
So when you are feeling stuck, you might try on a new perspective. Just because your horse or child or employee or parent is not following the instructions you think you are giving, it does not necessarily mean what you think it means if you are thinking only from your own point of view. It is usually harder to find a solution without knowing what the problem is, so take time to learn the other's perspective. Water and earth are not the same, but they were both essential in the creation of the Grand Canyon.
Obviously an argument can be made for either point of view depending on your perspective, which was exactly the author's point: perspective is everything. How do you see things? What are your values, expectations, intentions? Are they the same for the person or horse you are attempting to communicate with? Which is better, this style of approach or another? To insist that my way of seeing things is the only right way is to limit my vistas and possibilities and often leads to conflict.
People bring their horses to Rashid because they cannot get them to act the way they want them to act. What this successful trainer brings to each situation is the willingness to explore different perspectives, to experiment and see what might work to change the status quo, to open hearts for resolution of behavioral conflict. There is no punishment, no correcting to the "right way" to do or be. His flow of attention is like the river, his respect for boundaries like the rock, and I was reminded of the childhood game of Rock - Paper - Scissors. Scissors cuts paper which covers rock which breaks scissors. Each has its strengths and weaknesses depending on where you stand.
So when you are feeling stuck, you might try on a new perspective. Just because your horse or child or employee or parent is not following the instructions you think you are giving, it does not necessarily mean what you think it means if you are thinking only from your own point of view. It is usually harder to find a solution without knowing what the problem is, so take time to learn the other's perspective. Water and earth are not the same, but they were both essential in the creation of the Grand Canyon.
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