• Services
  • Coaching vs Therapy
  • About Charly
  • FAQs
  • Monthly Tidbits
  • Testimonials
  • Contact
Conversations For Change

February Tidbit: Harry the Hit Man

2/23/2012

0 Comments

 
Many years ago the governor of a midwestern state was assassinated by a professional hit man named Harry. Despite Harry's years of experience in his field, this particular job led to his arrest and he was sentenced  to prison. Several months after his incarceration he received a message from the late governor's wife stating that she was planning to come and see him the following week. Harry had some concerns about this. From the meticulous research he had done on his victim prior to the assassination he knew that the governor and his wife had been happily married, so he was pretty sure she was not coming to wish him well. In keeping with his character and experience, he anticipated that she might try to harm him in some way to avenge her husband's death. He spent many hours trying to figure out how she might attempt her revenge given the security precautions at the prison. 

When the appointed day came, Harry considered refusing to see the woman, but his curiosity got the better of him. The visiting area in Harry's prison was set up so that the visitor and the prisoner sat across from each other separated by a protective partition that offered visibility with no physical access. Harry felt relatively safe and decided to see what this visit was about.

The governor's wife was already seated when Harry was led in by the guard. He took his seat and lifted the handset. The woman did the same. She was the first to speak and looking him in the eyes she said, "I have come here today to tell you that God forgives you and I forgive you." Then she hung up the handset and walked away.

Harry was stunned. Of all the potential outcomes of this meeting that he had envisioned, this had not been one of them.

This story is about the impact of the choices we make regarding our burdens of fear, anger, grief, shame and guilt. Forgiveness is not saying that it was okay that something happened; rather it is the acceptance that it did happen and the willingness to let it be in the past rather than live it over and over in the present. The governor's wife recognized that as long she carried hatred and resentment she was harming herself, so she chose to forgive Harry in order to release her anger and get on with her life. She did not do it for Harry; she did it to set herself free. 

However, it so happened that shortly after his conversation with the governor's wife there seemed to be some sort of internal shift that occurred in Harry. Whereas prior to that event he had been pretty much concerned with his own self interest (which does seem to be an obvious requirement for his career choice), after his experience with the governor's wife, he became involved in the prison library and eventually was instrumental in setting up an educational program to teach reading and living skills to inmates. So perhaps our personal practice of forgiveness has the power to ripple through the world.

With deep appreciation for Dr. Herschel Lamp's original telling of this tale many years ago.
0 Comments

    Author

    Charly Hill is a Life Skills Coach and Self Empowerment Teacher.
    She has a MA in counseling and recently retired her California Marriage, Family and Child Therapist license. 

    Archives

    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013
    October 2013
    September 2013
    August 2013
    July 2013
    June 2013
    May 2013
    April 2013
    March 2013
    February 2013
    January 2013
    December 2012
    November 2012
    October 2012
    September 2012
    August 2012
    July 2012
    June 2012
    May 2012
    April 2012
    March 2012
    February 2012
    January 2012
    December 2011
    November 2011
    October 2011
    September 2011
    August 2011
    July 2011
    June 2011
    May 2011
    April 2011
    March 2011
    February 2011
    January 2011
    December 2010
    November 2010
    October 2010
    September 2010
    August 2010
    July 2010
    June 2010
    May 2010
    April 2010
    March 2010
    February 2010
    January 2010
    December 2009
    November 2009
    October 2009
    September 2009
    August 2009
    July 2009
    June 2009
    May 2009
    April 2009
    March 2009
    February 2009

    Categories

    All
    Abraham
    Acceptance
    Adventuring
    Affirmations
    Aim
    Alexander
    Alternatives
    Appreciation
    Attention
    Avoidance
    Awareness
    Balance
    Bear Heart
    Beginner\'s Mind
    Belief
    Beliefs
    Biology
    Blame
    Bleep
    Body
    Braden
    Breath
    Bus
    Business
    Celebration
    Change
    Choice
    Chronic Pain
    Coaching
    Coelho
    Cohen
    Community
    Compassion
    Connection
    Conscious
    Consciousness
    Control
    Conversations
    Conversations For Change
    Creative
    Creativity
    Crisis
    Curiosity
    Daydreaming
    Decisions
    Diversity
    Divesting
    Divine
    Divine Matrix
    Dna
    Do What You Love
    Dream
    Drugs
    Duality
    Earth School
    Ego
    Ego Mind
    Electrician
    Electricity
    Emotional Freedom
    Emotional Intelligence
    Emotions
    Empty Table
    Energy
    Energy Flow
    Energy Psychologies
    Exercise
    Expectations
    Fear
    Feel Good
    Feeling Bad
    Fibonacci
    Flaws
    Flight Or Fight
    Floyd
    Focus
    Forgiveness
    Gandhi
    Genetics
    Goals
    Gps
    Grace
    Grand Canyon
    Gratitude
    Grief
    Guilt
    Habit
    Happiness
    Harry
    Healing
    Heart And Head
    Heartbreaking Loss
    Heartmath
    Hicks
    Holds
    Holidays
    Horse
    Html
    Human
    Illness
    Illumination
    Imagination
    Inhibit
    Inhibition
    Inhibition And Redirection
    Inner Guidance
    Intelligence
    Jin Shin
    Joy
    Laws Of Attraction
    Learning
    Left Brain
    Lessons
    Letting Go
    Light
    Like Attracts Like
    List
    Longest Journey
    Loss
    Love
    Lynx
    Making Room
    Management
    Manifestation
    Manifesting
    Map
    Mary Oliver
    Mechanical
    Mindfulness
    Miracles
    Mistakes
    Mist In The Wind
    Monkey Mind
    Motion
    Myss
    Nature
    Nourishment
    Observation
    Open Heart
    Opportunities
    Opportunity
    Pain
    Patterns
    Perception
    Personal
    Perspective
    Pharmaceuticals
    Pony
    Power
    Power Of Choice
    Presence
    Ram Dass
    Reacting
    Redirect
    Re-direction
    Relationship
    Relationships
    Relaxation
    Releasing
    Relinquishing
    Renunciation
    Resentments
    Resistance
    Responsibility
    Right Brain
    Roles
    Ruiz
    Rules For Being Human
    Safety
    Self Soothing
    Soul
    Spinning
    Spirit
    Stories
    Story
    Stress
    Styles
    Success
    Sucker Day
    Thanksgiving
    The Committee
    Thinking
    Thought
    Thoughts
    Trauma
    Truck
    Trust
    Unconscious
    Vision
    Walsch
    Walt Whitman
    Wanting
    Weekly Tidbit
    What Is
    Williamson
    Worry
    Yoga
    Zen

    RSS Feed

  • Services
  • Coaching vs Therapy
  • About Charly
  • FAQs
  • Monthly Tidbits
  • Testimonials
  • Contact