We have our rituals to help us cope, and we all know, at least on some level, that everything is impermanent. But as a client once told me, the longest journey is the 18 inches from head to heart, and when the knowing of death moves from the head to the heart there is often profound struggle. Those of us who grew up close to nature and frequently witnessed the cycle of life and death may have less difficulty with the concept of leaving this earthly plane, but the experience is intensely different when it gets close and personal.
The stages of grief have been well documented. The initial denial attempts to protect us from an unwelcome reality. Fear and sadness frequently manifest as anger. Often we try to rationalize or bargain away our emotional distress in an attempt to stay in control, and depression permeates on some level until we are moved to accept our loss. This is not a linear process and we can travel back and forth on this continuum for an indefinite period, hopefully eventually coming to a place of acceptance. Acceptance, like forgiveness, does not mean that we have to like or approve of the change we are facing; we just need to acknowledge reality and come to terms with it.
Take in what we need
Let go of what is done
For Tango, RIP