The holiday season at the end of the year has the potential to be a stressful time. Days are short with less light, expectations run rampant, and family of origin issues are stirred up. Most holidays are about rituals and many of us have decades of traditional imprints that are not pleasant. Since holidays were generally not fun in my childhood, as an adult I have chosen to re-organize how I celebrate this time of year. And celebration is a key word. 

Developing a personal mission statement can help us stay on track and avoid being drawn into old familiar and undesired patterns. Write about how you want to be (perhaps grateful, open hearted, balanced....), what you want to do (maybe laugh, be of service to others, connect with loved ones....) and the values upon which your being and doing are based (love, celebration, unity, sharing, self care). I find it helpful to focus on what I want rather than what I want to avoid.  In Alexander Technique we are taught that we tend to go where we are looking, and the Laws of Attraction remind us that we draw that which we give attention to, so focus on how you want to feel and act so you can give energy and attention to creating your positive experience. Set up a plan that supports your goals and find language that allows you to feel good. Instead of "not overeating", think about "enjoying every bite". Visualize allowing any negativity to pass thru you like mist in the wind instead of trying to protect yourself from it. If people offer you something you don't want (more food, alcohol, criticism), you could say something like "Thank you for thinking about me; what I would really like is a hug (or some fresh air)." I learned "thank you for thinking about me" from Virginia Satir; it is such a powerful response as it acknowledges the person's heart and gives no attention to any judgmental content. If you find yourself going down a path that leads you away from your mission statement intentions, stop, have a moment of gratitude for the recognition, and change direction to get back on track.

Create new rituals that are appropriate for you. Think about what the holiday means, or what you want it to mean this time around. For me, Thanksgiving is about gratitude and appreciation, so part of my personal ritual is to acknowledge my gifts of the year, and to let people know I appreciate them in my life. This is also a good time to practice the art of allowing, appreciating others for who they are instead of how you want them to be. If a negative feeling or memory finds its way into your mind, let it go and choose another thought or action that allows you to feel good again. I like to go to the beach on holidays, even if it is for just a few minutes of light and appreciation. What would make your celebration meaningful? Plan it into your day. Be grateful for every small positive change you make; vibrate at a level of appreciation for the little things and you will draw more to be grateful for into your life.

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When I was preparing to move from California to Florida, I had an idea in my head that I was going to create a way to earn income from my interest in fabric and yarn and crafts. I have been noodling around with pins and needles for most of my life and it has ever been my goal to follow this piece of wisdom attributed to  Confucius: "Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life."  So why not put my love of crafting to "work" for me? I certainly did that with my psychotherapy /counseling / coaching career, combining my love of talking and learning and helping others into a practice that has  kept me financially afloat for thirty  years. 

Martin Luther King once said "Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase," and that certainly was my approach to starting my first private practice. I was living in a little town in Northern California whose population at the time was about 860 people. There was a loft over my garage and I converted it into an office. I read Marsha Sinetar's Do What You Love The Money Will Follow and watched the movie "Field of Dreams" to help counterbalance the input of well meaning nay-sayers who told me I was nuts to try to start a psychotherapy practice in the "middle of nowhere". (Yeah, and they laughed at my intention to manifest a horse, too. By this time I had two horses.)Within six months I had a thriving practice that started with one woman who referred her sister who referred her friend who referred her co-worker, etc. 

So here I go again. Thanks to a jump start from my step daughter, I just opened Earthwise Designs, a cyber shop on Etsy that specializes in handmade items made from recycled materials. And because I am ever the student teacher, I am including tiny tidbits of inspirational quotes or recycling ideas with each listing. The process of setting up a cyber shop has made me more internet and computer savvy and I now have free license to knit, sew, and recycle fabric to my heart's content as well as the opportunity to empty my closets of completed projects in order to make room for more abundance. 

This is what I have learned about manifesting your dreams:

1. Get clear on what it is you want. You don't need to have the whole picture in detail, but a basic idea is helpful to start. And then add possible details, snapshots, images, create a dream board collage or draw a picture, in your mind or in tangible reality, both are valid. Focus on what it is you do want, feed it, it will grow.

2. Take action: give your dream positive attention every day. Write about it. Journal your thoughts and feelings, write your daily progress towards your desired goal (even if it is "I dreamt about it today"). Create images in your mind. Choose to believe it is in process of happening. I remember the story of one woman who wanted to manifest her soul mate. Every night at dinner she set an extra plate for him at her table. He showed up. Not that first night or even the first week, but he did show up. Be persistent. 

3. Notice without judging any obstacles that arise in your mind and attend to the inner reorganization necessary to attain your goal. Get a coach, therapist, do TAT or EFT, balance your chakras, pray and meditate ....... take whatever positive action you need to release those fears that prevent you from having what you want.

4. Talk about it to anyone who will really listen. Research and learn. Shamelessly self promote. You just might say a word in the ear of someone who has information or direction to give you. By the way, my shop address is 
http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=7092530

5. Choose love. Surround yourself with inspiration and support. Choose not to spend time with people who drain you or belittle your feelings and dreams. Interact with books, tapes, natural environments, and people that nourish you. Do things that you love and that make you feel good. Practice gratitude for everything, including this dream coming true. (Remember Einstein's concept of time.) 

6. Let go of any attachment to how it has to be and be ready to receive what comes to you. At the same time, be specific as to what you want. Honor paradox. Trust the universe to bring it to you in the best possible way. And let yourself recognize opportunity when it comes even if it does not look the way you expect it to.

May you have wings to fly,

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